


dear theodosia

by zzdreamt



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Angst, Background Relationships, Bc that’s who I meant, Bisexual Alexander Hamilton, Coming Out, F/F, Family, Gay, Gay John Laurens, Internalized Homophobia, Is Theo Burr Alston his daughter, Lesbian Character, Lots of Crying, M/M, Other, TOO MUCH, lol, platonic fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-01
Updated: 2020-03-01
Packaged: 2021-02-28 00:07:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,883
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22974520
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zzdreamt/pseuds/zzdreamt
Summary: Upon approaching the building, with his hands stuffed in his pockets and his face buried in his scarf, the last thing he expected to see was Theodosia Burr, Aaron Burr’s daughter, sitting on the steps.Aka, a soft coming out fic
Relationships: Aaron Burr & Theodosia Burr Alston, Alexander Hamilton/John Laurens
Comments: 12
Kudos: 93





	dear theodosia

**Author's Note:**

> I cried writing this!!  
> Anyways it’s super cute (in my opinion at least) and the oNlY romantic relationship in this is Lams. Nothing gross or illegal because NEVER! NOPE! NOT GONNA HAPPEN!
> 
> Thanks for reading! Kudos and comments are my lifeline.

The lull of winter in New York City was almost always filled with powerful winds and intense snowstorms every once in a while. The harsh frigid temperatures of early and mid winter were holding strong and creating freezing conditions all over. Even though John Laurens moved up there from South Carolina years ago when he attended college at Colombia, he wasn’t quite used to the intense cold. Alas, he found himself walking home one particular day, since his boyfriend Alexander had needed the car to pick up some groceries (they always took turns). It wasn’t a long distance from his job at the local hospital to their apartment building, just a subway ride and a short walk, but it was enough to send a chill deep in his bones. Upon approaching the building, with his hands stuffed in his pockets and his face buried in his scarf, the _last_ thing he expected to see was Theodosia Burr, Aaron Burr’s daughter, sitting on the steps.  
Once she spotted him coming up the sidewalk, she sprang up and waited for him to come up to her. The girl had to be about sixteen by now— Aaron had become a father at a young age. She was petite but had a soft and curvy figure, with short, wavy, jet-black hair and large brown eyes elegantly lined with thick eyeliner. She was wearing a simple black north face jacket and a pair of leggings with some yellow converse, leaving John bewildered at how she wasn’t shaking from the cold.   
“Mr. Laurens-“  
“Theo, you can explain inside,” he said quickly, rushing past her and taking his keys out with trembling hands to unlock the door. “It’s too fuc- it’s too cold out here.”  
She frowned slightly but followed him inside, politely shutting the door behind them and locking it. Two flights of stairs and another set of locks later, they were inside John and Alexander’s apartment. Theodosia took a moment to look around; she’d never been there before. It smelled like cinnamon incense, coffee, and cologne. The furniture was slightly mismatched, but what else was to be expected of two post-grad students finally kicking off in their careers.  
As John settled down, Theo took a seat on the couch and fiddled with her fingers. John rubbed his hands together in an attempt to warm up and bustled around the apartment, turning the heat up and sliding out of his shoes and into some slippers. For a moment, he disappeared into his bedroom to change out of his hospital scrubs and into some more comfortable, warm clothes.  
“Can I get you anything to drink?” John asked Theo once he had come out of his room. “I have tea, coffee, water… maybe some apple juice if Alexander didn’t drink it all…”  
Theo cleared her throat and nodded. “Some tea would be nice. Ginger, if you have it.”  
John smiled from behind the opening in the wall between the kitchen and the living area. “Ms. Burr,” he said in a horrible British accent, “any tea you desire, I likely have in my cabinet.”  
Theo laughed at John as he grinned and put the kettle on the stove. A few minutes later, he emerged from the kitchen with two steaming mugs. After setting them down, he dashed back into the kitchen and grabbed some honey and two spoons. Finally, he sat down across the coffee table from Theo and picked up his mug, spooned a little honey in it, and leaned back as he stirred.  
“So what brings you here?” he asked. “I’ve only ever hung out with you and your dad two or three times, right? Alexander knows your dad better than I do, for that matter.”  
Theo shrugged and picked up her mug of tea, focusing on blowing the steam away for that moment. “I didn’t know who else to come to,” she said quietly, not looking at John.  
He frowned slightly and leaned forwards so his elbows were resting on his knees. “What’s going on?”  
It was silent for a moment. Theo stared at the mug in her hands, and suddenly, tears welled up in her eyes and she let out a quiet sob.  
John, immediately concerned, rushed to put down his tea and sit down beside her, awkwardly rubbing her back in an attempt to calm her down.  
“It’s okay, Theo, take a few deep breaths with me,” he said quietly. “Whatever it is, you can talk to me, yeah?”  
She sniffed and nodded, but the tears didn’t stop. John pulled away for a moment to reach for the tissue box before offering it to her, which she gladly accepted and wiped at her eyes.  
After a few minutes, Theo had calmed down but was still taking quivering breaths as if the dam was bound to break at any second. “W-when did you know you liked boys?” she asked tentatively. “I- I mean I don’t know if you’re gay or bi or pan but-“  
“It’s okay,” John said quietly. He continued to rub her back, still concerned about the situation. “I knew I was gay when I was seventeen,” he began. “For whatever reason, I was confused at the time, I didn’t know why girls just didn’t seem right for me. My friends in the south were all talking about their highschool sweethearts and taking them to dances, but whenever a girl asked me out, I just had to turn them down. By the time I became a senior in highschool, I realized I had always been confused about how I felt since I was fifteen. I just didn’t want to admit to myself that I’m gay.” He shrugged. “I fooled around with a couple guys in my freshman year of college, but then I met Alexander…” A smile formed on his face. “He helped me realize that it’s okay to love another man. He was my first serious relationship- he still is. I love him, and it’s right for me. It’s _right._ ”   
“What about coming out?” Theo asked hesitantly. “Did you ever formally do it?”  
John chuckled lightly and folded his hands in his lap. “My sister already had her suspicions, my mom was kind of indifferent, but my _dad_ …” He shook his head. “When I came out to my dad, he was _livid._ He probably called me every combination of homophobic slurs and kept telling me that it was just a phase, that it wasn’t natural. Hell, he threatened to send me to conversion therapy. So I shut up about it until I moved out and went to college. I went to a therapist for about a year to talk about it, which helped me immensely.”   
John paused and glanced down at Theo with a raised eyebrow. “Why are you asking me all this?”  
Theodosia her throat and felt her cheeks heat up. “I- I uh- You’re the only gay person I know besides Alexander?”  
“And…?“  
She sighed and buried her face in her hands. “I needed advice because… I think- no, I _know_ I’m lesbian.”   
John’s eyebrows shot up and his mouth fell open. He felt his heart soften and his eyes glaze over. “Am I the first person you’ve told?” he asked quietly.  
Theo looked up at him and nodded. Her lower lip was quivering ever so slightly.  
“Theo…” he whispered. He gently took her hand and looked her in the eyes. “Thank you. I’m honored to have been the first, I understand how hard this must have been.” He bit his lip for a moment. “Does this have to do with coming out to your dad?”  
She nodded again.  
“Okay,” John said quietly. “Alright. Good. I’m here to help, but first…” He smiled at her and lightly squeezed her hand. “We have to celebrate!”   
Theo paused, then laughter slowly bubbled out of her mouth into full-blown mirth. The two of them stood and John led her to the kitchen. For the next two hours, he and Theo made rainbow cupcakes with cream cheese frosting and more rainbow sprinkles. At one point, Theo blew a handful of flour into John’s face, to which he retaliated by throwing a small handful onto her shirt, which turned into a full-blown flour fight. By the end, they were laughing hysterically and everything was absolutely covered with flour.  
While they were waiting for the cupcakes to cool, they settled down for a game of Uno.  
“Plus eight!!” Theo exclaimed, slapping down a fourth +2 card.  
John groaned and picked up the cards. “Remind me to never play Uno with you ever again.”  
She grinned at him from behind the cards and winked. He couldn’t help but smile back at her, even as the number of cards in his hand nearly doubled.  
They were interrupted by a scuffling noise from the other side of the door, followed by the sound of keys turning in the lock and someone stumbling inside with too much in their arms.  
“ _Shit_ ,” somebody mumbled. “John? A little help?”  
John stood up from the game and rushed to the door, where Alexander was standing with four massive bags of groceries in his arms.  
“Jesus, Alex, how did you even get up the stairs?”   
Alexander sighed heavily as he transferred two of the bags to John. “I had to leave the store in a rush because Burr called me asking if I knew where his daughter, Theodosia, was- _as if I’d know?_ He said he couldn’t get in touch with her and his phone was about to die so he asked me to help him, but I told him that I had to take the stuff home. I’m gonna help him, of course, but John... he was _literally crying in the office’s bathroom and wanted to call the cops and_ -“  
Alexander stopped when he saw Theodosia sitting on the couch. “Oh,” he said, shocked. “Um… hi Theo.”  
“Hi Mr. Hamilton,” she said awkwardly, but looking concerned. “My dad is looking for me?”  
Alexander turned to John and set the bag down. “Why is she-“  
“Please don’t tell him I’m here… not yet,” Theo pleaded, putting down her Uno cards.  
Alexander’s eyebrows shot up, and he glanced between John and Theodosia for a solid minute. “Okaaaay… someone explain what’s going on. Are you okay, Theo? Did something happen?”  
Theodosia looked at John pleadingly. He nodded in understanding and took Alexander’s hand. “Theo came here for some support,” he began. “She wants to come out to her dad, but she isn’t sure how he’ll react because she’s his daughter, and family is always a little different.”  
Alexander was stunned. Slowly, he made his way towards Theo and knelt down in front of her. “Hey,” he said quietly. “That’s a pretty big deal.”  
She nodded, and Alexander could see that tears were threatening to spill down her cheeks. “I- I came here because I didn’t know who else to turn to,” she said softly. “I kind of forgot that’s why I’m here, John was just helping me destress…”  
John came up and sat on her other side. “Do you want us to call your dad to come here so you can tell him? That way we’ll be here with you?”  
Theodosia sobbed and covered her face with her hands. “I don’t know,” she choked out. “I- I’m so _scared-“  
_ “Hey, _hey_ …” Alexander said, taking her hand in his and squeezing it gently. “It’s okay… your dad _will_ love you and accept you. He already loves you so much, Theo, I mean… he was ready to call the cops because he couldn’t contact you.” He gave her a small smile. “Plus, he’s been good with John and I, right?”  
He looked to John who smiled and nodded, taking Alexander’s other hand and pressing a kiss to the back.   
He looked back at Theo. “Even before he lost your mother, he looked at you like you were his _entire world._ He has at least a dozen pictures of you in his office… there’s _nothing_ he wouldn’t do for you. You’re brave enough to come and talk to John, so you’re definitely strong enough to talk to Aaron. Right?”   
Theo sniffed and nodded, wiping at her eyes. “Okay. You can call him,” she whispered. “Thank you.”  
Alexander looked to John, who nodded and stood, grabbing his phone to call Aaron. After a few minutes, John came back from the hall and sat back next to Theo.  
“He’ll be here shortly.”

Theodosia was shaking by the time the buzzer went off, alerting Alexander and John of someone at the front door. They unlocked it and let Aaron in, whose footsteps they could hear from inside the apartment. There came frantic knocking on the door, and as soon as Alexander opened it, Burr rushed inside, looking around for Theo. When his eyes fell on her, he rushed over and all but collapsed onto his knees.  
“ _Theo_ , oh my god, I was so worried,” he sobbed, cradling her face in his hands. “Why are you here? Why didn’t you return my calls? I- I was about to call the police and _I was so afraid I’d lost you-_ “ Aaron paused when he noticed Theo wordlessly crying, her tears slipping into his hands. He pulled them away and took her hands in his. “ _What happened?_ ”  
Alexander and John both stood to the side, shocked at the heart-throbbing scene in front of them. Neither had ever seen Burr this open, this vulnerable: it was obvious how much he cared for his daughter.  
John cleared his throat, catching Burr’s attention. “Theo came here because she had some questions and had a good reason to… ask us before she spoke to you,” he said, slipping his hand into Alexander’s. He looked to Theodosia and nodded. “Go ahead, it’s okay.”  
She nodded and pulled one hand away from her father’s grasp and wiped at her eyes. “D-dad,” she began, her voice wavering slightly. She cleared her throat and adjusted her posture, taking a deep breath. “I- I just want you to know that this doesn’t change anything about me. My personality is still the same, I’m still interested in the same things at school, a-and,” she swallowed thickly. “I’m still your little girl,” she said, her voice cracking.  
Aaron has tears in his eyes and Theo hadn’t even gotten to the main point yet. “What is it, my love?” he asked softly. “Talk to me, please…”  
Theodosia tried to remain calm and collected, but the façade broke as she let a sob escape and curled into her father’s chest. “I’m gay,” she sobbed. “I- I hope you still love me because I can’t change it, and John and Alex have been so supportive and- _god_ I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner-“  
Alexander grabbed a tissue and wiped his eyes, doing little to stop the onslaught of tears. John squeezed his hand and took a deep breath.  
Aaron’s mouth had fallen open, and his hand rested on Theo’s back as she cried into his chest. He stammered and struggled to form a coherent thought until he let out a single sob and moved his other arm so he had his daughter in a full embrace.  
“Oh, Theo…” Aaron whispered. “Of course I still love you, I love you _so much_ …” He could feel his heart breaking in his chest. Had his daughter _really_ been this afraid to tell him? “It’s okay,” he said. “You’re so brave, you’re so beautiful… I’m _so proud of you_ , Theodosia… Of course you’ll always be my little girl.”  
He leaned away slightly and lifted her chin so they were face to face.  
“Thank you for telling me,” he said sincerely.  
Theo gasped for breath and smiled a wide, gorgeous smile. She laughed in relief and joy and threw her arms around her father’s neck.  
“ _I love you, dad_ ,” she whispered shakily.  
By this point, Alexander was full on breaking down. Burr turned to them with tears still in his eyes and mouthed a quiet thank you.  
Soon after, the two Burrs were on their way home with a batch of rainbow cupcakes. Alexander and John collapsed on the couch, each letting out breaths they didn’t know they’d been holding.  
“She’s a lucky girl,” John said, smiling to himself. “I’m so happy for her.”  
“You know Aaron’s gonna become one of those major ally parents now, right?” Alexander chuckled. “We’ll have to get them to come to Pride with us.”  
John laughed and pulled Alexander closer. When everything went quiet, he leaned his head against John’s chest.  
“I love you,” Alexander whispered. “You’re so amazing.”  
John snorted. “Someone’s sappy.”  
“Shut up,” Alexander retorted with a smile. He turned his head and pecked John’s lips.  
At the Burr residence, Aaron ordered from Theo’s favorite Thai restaurant and they shared the cupcakes while watching _the office_. Theodosia curled into her father’s side and eventually fell asleep, so Aaron didn’t dare move from his position on the couch. He closed his eyes and smiled, a genuine smile, and for a moment, he could’ve sworn he felt his wife’s presence with them on the couch.   
“ _Thank you_ ,” he whispered into the room.  
No winter chill caused the small family to shiver, for all the warmth in their hearts wouldn’t allow the cold world to extinguish the father-daughter love they shared. 


End file.
